Have you ever watched an NBA game and thought, “Boy, I wish those players were my personal sex slaves?” If your answer is “yes” (or “no”) then you can run your very own fantasy basketball team… as long as you meet the following requirements:
1. No fear of the internet
2. Survived viewing of Chairman of the Board
3. Able and willing to read
4. Can drink gallon of milk in less than an hour
The training is intense…
But the rewards are worth itHere’s the deal: A few friends and myself started a basketball league and we now find ourselves several managers short of a full league. If you’re at all interested in participating in sex slavery fantasy basketball please leave me a comment with your email address or email me directly at hawaiimatthew@hotmail.com (or use the mailing button to the right of the page ->).
If you DO want to participate but are afraid to because you’re unknowledgeable about the NBA, suffer from halitosis, or have excessive back hair then I’ve got a proposition:
I will share my Yoda-like experience and wisdom with you through this blog and train you like the late Mr. Miyagi.
Perhaps our journey of growth and learning will lead to a movie deal in which I will be played by George Clooney and you can be played by that chick from Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Place.
Let’s go make that fantasy come true.
The Spoon 
hi! nice blog! keep up the good work!
Would you like to exchange links with my blog? Its The JOKES Blog – http://jokingblog.blogspot.com/
If you want to exchange links, please link to me and leave me a comment, and i’ll link right back!
Thanks!
You know, that chick’s on Monk now. It’d be cool with me to be played by her.
But I hesitate to say I’ll participate b/c I don’t like the NBA very much…
Yup, you’re right. Traylor Howard always pops up when I don’t expect, it like in Dirty Work (I like Norm MacDonald) and in Son of the Mask, which I thankfully avoided.
But you should learn to broaden your horizens and watch the NBA. They have new rules this year about not complaining and I think player induced pregnancies are down 15% from 2005.
Maybe… We do have a team here in town that I could at least pay a little attention.
But I just love the college hoops and I don’t know if I would be spreading myself too thin.
You promise Traylor Howard will play me in the movie? I’ll think about it.
I promise Traylor Howard can play you, although I think I’ll have to get George Clooney to say “my hair!” while playing my part. I love that line.
You should also know that fantasy basketball makes watching NBA games much more exciting and you can amaze friends and family with your knowledge of statistics.